Resolve Conflict the Right Way

What 1 Corinthians 13 Teaches Us About Conflict

By Margaret Kemp

Who would have thought that an innocent discussion about tacos could intensify into an angry conflict? Our conversation began on playful terms, but soon my husband and I resorted to snippy comments and snide remarks. I believed my opinion was right. Unfortunately, my husband also wanted to be right, and a rift developed. Over tacos!

Advice from Paul on Conflict

Later, I was reading 1 Cor. 13:4-7, the passage we often hear at weddings. As I examined these verses in depth, I began to imagine what it would look like to lovingly handle a disagreement.

Our varying abilities, strengths, and talents enable us to help one another, but sometimes our differences cause conflict. The apostle Paul reminds us that envy and comparison are unproductive. Then he tells us the most excellent way to relate to one another: in love (1 Cor. 12:31-13:1).

When I’m in the middle of a difficult conversation, I’m not always loving. I want the other person to understand my point of view and agree with my way of doing things. But when conflicts arise, what if we stopped trying to win an argument and concentrated on demonstrating love?

Manage Emotions

If we want to resolve a conflict, it’s important to get our emotions under control. The Bible says love is patient and kind. As James 1:19 advises, “Be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” The more sensitive the issue, the more important it is to control our emotions.

I’ve learned the hard way that tears and temper tantrums rarely resolve conflicts. It’s crucial to listen first, weigh our words carefully before we speak, and maintain a mild tone of voice.