Weekly Magazine | The Freedom to Flourish
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Free to Flourish
By: Shelly Esser
A friend stopped me in my tracks: “I hope you are flourishing.” Unexpectantly, tears began to spill down my face. You see…I was not flourishing and hadn’t been for some time. Instead, I had been only surviving, just getting by. God used those words that day to get my attention and take me on a journey that has changed the course of my life.
Decades of hard stuff had slowly drained the life out of me. I started out like a balloon full of air and promise only to watch the air leak out. The leak was so slow that I didn’t even recognize what was happening. But I felt deflated emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I had become a shell of myself. Who was I? What was I passionate about? I didn’t know. I lost myself—the girl inside who used to be so passionate and positive and ready to take on the world. Where was she?
In my tears, God invited me to flourish—and He would show me how. And the good news as Jennie Lusko puts it: “When God calls us to ‘flourish,’ it doesn’t mean to become something brand new. It means to revive; to bring back to life what and who we were meant to be. We weren’t created to become something totally different but to become what we were originally designed for.” I found that comforting. Because somewhere in the middle of my lost self was the girl God had always created me to be. She was in there and He was just waiting to set her free to flourish—in every way—even through the hard stuff.
What I got so wrong was that flourishing can only happen when everything is going well, when my circumstances are good. We don’t have to wait to flourish until life settles down and is free of troubles (that will never happen). Love, joy, gratitude, peace, hope and an overall well-being can happen in any season of our lives and in any circumstances. And it can start today!
Here are some steps I’ve been working on in my flourishing journey to revive the life God wants me to live and to set that lost girl free.
OPEN YOUR SOUL UP TO GOD
No more pretending, no more going through empty motions. Lay it all out on the table with Him. He knows anyway. Be real…be raw…tell it like it is. Pour your brokenness out to God, tell Him you’re angry, share your doubts, express the pain of unanswered prayers, and unhealed minds and bodies. He can handle it. Let Him cradle your broken heart. Let Him rub the healing balm of His deep love into your wounds. See the darkness, the deadness as an invitation from God to discover Him in a deeper way and to a pathway of healing for the unspoken pain you have carried alone for far too long. An invitation that will lead you to become the flourisher He designed you to be.
List every disappointment, hurt, disillusionment, grief, doubt—every cry of your heart. Go back so you can go forward. It’s the enemy’s lie that keeps us burying pain deep within our souls. It only results in distance from God.
TAKE OFF YOUR SACKCLOTH
Psalm 30:8; 11 says, “To you, O LORD, I called; to the LORD I cried for mercy…you turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.” Sackcloth is “a garment which was worn as a token of mourning by the Israelites. A sign of grief.” It’s essential to work through our grief in a healthy way and take the necessary time to do that, but we can’t flourish if our wailing never becomes dancing and the only outfit in our wardrobe is sackcloth. Gently, the Lord said, “It’s time to take off your sackcloth, to stop wallowing in your losses and exchange them for the joy I have waiting for you.” It was hard because I had become so comfortable in my sackcloth—I had worn it for years—but we can’t stay in sorrow forever. We need to see the beautiful and find the joy again.
LET GOD LOVE YOU
Part of God’s flourishing plan for me was for me to rediscover His incredible love for me in a way I had not understood before—a love not based on what I did for Him, not based on my worthiness, but on me in my messiness, just as I am, the beloved daughter of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! For the first time I started to really believe and experience that. Nothing…not weariness, not brokenness, not missing a quiet time, not my worst version of myself, not living in sackcloth for too long could change His love for me. God loves me. Period.
BUILD FUN INTO YOUR LIFE
When I started to look back at the lost girl, I noticed that she used to be fun. Somehow that got deflated as well. I had given so much of myself in the process of caring for others, it became hard to even remember what I loved to do before medical illnesses and its weary aftermath took up residence in my life. So every week I scheduled something fun. My soul desperately needed that and I started flourishing again.
FIND SOMEONE TO JOURNEY WITH YOU
Too often, I allowed myself to struggle alone. I heard voices from my past telling me that I needed to be strong—more air out of my balloon. We can’t go it alone. Flourishing involves inviting people who can help us along the way. I started meeting with an incredibly wise life coach who has helped me tremendously. To have a cheerleader when you feel so beaten down for so long has been a healing balm to my soul. We need someone to help us hold our arms up in the battle, in the moments of crushing defeats and setbacks, in the moments when it looks like we’re not going to win—to help us fill our balloons up again. She did that for me.
The flourishing journey will look different for each of us—and it takes time. But we have an incredibly patient and loving God who sees our struggles, our pain, our distance—our deflated balloons—and He comes alongside us to free us from the things that get in the way of the flourishing life He intended. And as we let Him bring our lost selves back to life, He welcomes us with open arms and fills us up with joy again.
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JEREMIAH 17:7-8, TLB
“But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD and has made the LORD his hope and confidence. He is like a tree planted along a riverbank, with its roots reaching deep into the water—a tree not bothered by the heat not worried by long months of drought. Its leaves stay green, and it goes right on producing all its luscious fruit.”
Well-Being by Design
By: Connie Fink
I had a problem: I had no physical or emotional energy, and it was getting worse. The solution seemed to require more than a walk or a nap. Did I have a disease? Was I depressed? Or was this just part of getting older? I gave myself six weeks. If I didn’t see improvement by then, I would go to a doctor. Those weeks were probably the most significant weeks of my life! I started dreaming about a new design for growth in my life. With Christ’s help, I dug, pruned, and began to redesign my "flower bed" of well-being. I’ve learned that everyone grows what they want in their way. And, while the results look different, the essentials to cultivate a flourishing garden are the same…
10 Steps to Flourish Where You Are
By: Lisa Elliott
Rather than dreaming about the day 'when things get better', maybe we ought to consider Solomon’s sage advice: “Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’ For it is not wise to ask such questions” (Eccl. 7:10). God’s will for our lives offers so much more than drudgery and hopelessness. He wants us to flourish and thrive. He wants us to produce fruit that will last into eternity—not just shriveled grapes, but fresh, tasty, abundant fruit (John 15)! The good news is that He provides us with everything we need, and more, to produce just that (2 Pet. 1:3–7)...
Heavenly Father,
We come before You, seeking Your guidance and strength to flourish where we are, even despite our circumstances. Help us to embrace the freedom to flourish in our lives by opening up our souls to You, crying out for Your help, and finding solace in Your loving presence. Teach us to cease wallowing in our losses and instead exchange them for joy, letting Your love fill our hearts.
Grant us the courage to trust You fully, knowing that You can help us take an honest account of our lives and guide us into cultivating a life that can flourish and thrive. May we always remember that in Your hands, we are never alone and that Your grace is sufficient for us in all situations.
In Jesus’ name, we pray. Amen.
What are some steps you’ve tried that are helping you flourish?